We Willnae Be Fooled Again


Posts tagged with "australia"

What are a few things you wish non-Australian people knew about Australia?



I’ve been thinking about this ask for a while and here’s what I’ve come up with;

Australia is pronounced “uh-STRAY-lee-ah” rather than “AWW-stray-lee-ah”
Melbourne is pronounced “MEL-bin”, not “mel-BORN”
Brisbane is “BRIS-bin”, not “BRIS-bay-n”
Canberra is “CAN-brah”, not “can-BER-rah”

"Yeah nah" means no
"Nah yeah" means yes

"Fanny" means vagina, not butt

No-one under the age of 60 actually says “G’day mate”

Pies are full of meat

This is fairy bread and everyone should experience it’s magic at children’s birthday parties

These are thongs

These are biscuits

Male kangaroos obviously don’t have pouches because males DON’T HAVE BABIES

Kangaroos don’t just hang around people’s houses they’re wild anim- Oh wait this is my driveway;

Aug 3

How Racist is Australia? Pretty Damn Racist.



This is my response (originally published in Crikey) to Mark Sawyer’s article ‘How Racist Are You’ published in The Age and Sydney Morning Herald last week (http://www.smh.com.au/comment/how-racist-are-you-20140611-zs43h.html)

Dear Mark,

As a comedian I very much appreciated your satirical piece ‘How Racist Are You?’ published in The Age last week.  I think you captured the attitude and tone of Overly Defensive And Clueless White Man perfectly.  It’s actually  inspired me to write my own piece called “Hey Ladies, Pipe Down About Sexism.”
Of course, I’m being silly.  You didn’t write it as a parody piece. The truth is much more embarrassing. This is what you, and plenty of others, actually think: apparently racism is totes not a thing any more.
Being told by white people that racism is a figment of our imagination is nothing new.  I know well enough that when looking for some quality racism, the best place to start is with the guy screaming “I’m not racist!” You did not disappoint.
Thank you for the awkward list of times you didn’t challenge people’s casual racist comments.  As the kids say nowadays, cool story bro.  And maybe you’re right - there is nothing that justifies calling Australia uniquely racist. Not the specific genocide of Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples, cultures and languages, an unparalleled migration history that banned non-white immigration here until the early 70s, or our one-of-a-kind anti-asylum regime.  These are things that happened pretty much everywhere, right?  But seriously, why let history and facts get in the way of a white guy’s Feelings About Stuff.
You’re correct, far right parties like One Nation are a thing of the past. But only because their rampant xenophobia was quickly co-opted, re-branded and shared between Labor and Liberal, making Hanson totally redundant.  In an era where our Attorney General openly defends the art of bigotry, Pauline’s services are no longer required.
You ask how many people alive are truly racist.  I don’t know the exact figures, Mark. But ask yourself if the life expectancy statistics that apply to Aboriginal people - well below the national average - would be tolerated if they applied to any other group in this country .  Ask yourself if our system of militarised  border protection and detention - recognised as exceptional the world over - would be acceptable to the Australian public if it was designed to intercept, round up and indefinitely incarcerate white people. 
These things cannot exist without a sizeable population of what you refer to as ‘true racists.’ The fact that, as a nation, we accept and allow such things to happen is not an accident or the result of simple misunderstandings. They are the calculated outcomes of generations of programming.  Maybe racism is less about white people making unfortunate comments and more about systemic inequalities that have become the permanent and invisible background noise of Australian culture.  To quote you, it may pay to look at the bigger picture.
It’s 2014, champ. Racism isn’t about segregated lunch counters and people refusing to shake hands any more.  Racism is about this country’s obsession with defining boundaries of inclusion and exclusion, and the pervasive and violent ways in which those boundaries are maintained.  Racism is about two major parties collaborating for years to convince a white majority, through various codes, that they are perpetually at risk of losing out to lazy Aborigines, ghettoised migrants, dishonest asylum seekers and suspicious Muslims.  Racism is a government using free speech rhetoric to facilitate racial vilification.  Racism is, in a climate of perpetual fear and hostility, The Age choosing to publish some childish nonsense about how there’s no such thing as racism.
You’re convinced things have changed. I’m pretty confident they haven’t.
Aamer Rahman is a standup comic and writer in Melbourne.  He is currently touring his solo show The Truth Hurts in the UK and does not miss Australia.


I’ll reblog this in the morning, when Australia is actually awake, but…

I collaborated with some fellow political tragics on this info-thing about the Abbott government’s proposed changes to Medicare and the pharmaceutical benefits scheme, based on this study from the University of Sydney (PDF).

There’s also a single-image version, on my website.

Accompanying links:

Please reblog and share however you can! Even if you’re not Australian but you like the cute animals and maybe some of your followers are Australian, for example?


A number of women on Christmas Island have attempted suicide, reportedly because they believed their orphaned children would then be allowed to stay in Australia (X, X)

This is what our asylum seeker policies are doing to people. This is what mandatory detention is doing to people. 

There is no justification for treating people this way.

oh jesus fucking christ

Dec 4

rest in pieces mutavore


rest in pieces mutavore

Dec 3



so what you’re saying is




so what you’re saying is


(Source: twitter.com)

Nov 3

Post offices 'can't handle' Centrelink services



Is this the same Australia Post that they’re thinking of privatising? Wow, that’d go wonderfully…

Potentially more seriously:

The Abbott Government is also looking at handing responsibility for the NDIS over to Medibank Private.

Senator Cameron warned that such a policy could change the way the scheme is administered, saying that the NDIS was ‘not something that should be driven by profit’.

Mr Hockey has labelled the current NDIS scheme a ‘massive new bureaucracy,’ but Senator Cameron disagrees, describing the attack as ‘rhetoric from the Coalition’ trying to ‘demonise government services.’

‘What you have to do is have a proper approach on this, and we need a high level government capacity to look after people who are down and out,’ he said.

They’re planning to privatise Medibank Private. I somehow suspect that handing the NDIS over to private groups would not help protect the interests of people with disabilities.

I know my local post office was thrilled to hear this suggestion in the news—frankly I think if this was rolled out at least half of them would quit.

my bet though is that the government will then turn around and farm centrelink out to a private company to manage on behalf of the gov’t, and go “SEE IT COULD HAVE BEEN SO MUCH WORSE, AT LEAST WE DIDN’T GIVE IT TO THE POST OFFICE!”


some days I feel like it’s overreacting to be so terrified of what the government’s going to come up with next? and then shit like this gets thrown around. why does he want to systematically tear down what few things we have …. not even going in our favour, but why the hell is he so set on making them worse?

(I know why :(  )

The battle between OHMGGODINEEDTOPROPOSERIGHTNOW and feeling ill over the cutting out of trans* rights

I mean it’s a huge step that they were there to begin with but it’s just not good enough

Sep 5




"If you think homosexuality is an unnatural condition, I cannot agree with you."
Kevin Rudd smashes a pastor’s views on marriage equality on Q&A [x]

Aw gosh, I’m feelin’ all proud to be an Australian right now. I know where my vote will be going!

I love that our pm shut somebody down calling them “mate”

This was amazing. So much respect for Rudd right now. 

Not very turned on to Rudd rn but there’s always that twinge of fond amusement at the ubiquitousness of the Aussie ‘mate’.

(Source: raphmike)

Sep 4

Done my civic duty.  Voted.